Tuesday, December 07, 2004

hey, these cookies taste like styrofoam

One summer as we rode our bikes home from work, we noticed a pile of free stuff, situated on the curb. We parked our bikes against a stacking of wooden chairs, cheap prints encased in flimsy dirty cardboard matting, and a large box containing dirty and slightly burned plastic coated large kitchen utensils. These items and several more cardboard boxes full of belongings that belonged to nobody, had been abandoned outside of an empty, clean painted, neatly trimmed lawn of an old bright two story house. While we were digging past Tai Bo videotapes, a rainbow array of sleeveless turtlenecks, coffee mugs with broken handles, and a thighmaster, I noticed a seald tin canister with wintery and christmasy designs on it. I read the label, and it said that the tin contained iced gingerbread cookies, from Germany! We had been pretty broke, and sweets were a luxury item, so I took the tin thinking that a cup of coffee later with some of these cookies would be a sweet treat.

After dinner, I was hit with the gingerbread cookie craving, and proceeded to unwrap the tin. The tin was sealed in shrinkwrapped plastic, and inside of that was a sealed plastic package that contained about ten cookies. I greedily tore open the packaging, and began to wolf down a cookie. After two huge bites, I thought to myself, "Boy these cookies are okay, but the icing tastes like styrofoam!" The icing kind of reminded me of the holy wafer I would have to eat at church when I received communion. I took two more big bites, eating about 3/4 of the cookie, and I notice the "icing" was seperating from the cookie. Upon closer inspection, I noitced that the icing was actually styrofoam backing, placed between cookies so they don't stick or are easier to pry apart.

Of course, as soon as I realized what I had done I became nauseaous. I confered with my signifant other, who assured me that I would be okay, and everything would come out in the end. Then I thought about tinsel-eating pets and all the glass I've probably ingested, and figured I would be okay.

so far, so good. It's been a couple of years.

happy, pappy?


3 comments:

GrapeNut said...

I suddenly feel like have a styrofoam cookie.

GrapeNut said...

I suddenly feel like a styrofoam cookie.

GrapeNut said...

This post a comment thing is annoying. God forbid you go back and correct some dumb thing you typed!