Saturday, August 17, 2013

I get a lot of spam email but don't realize it

Gmail has this feature where junk mail just goes to this spam box and automatically deletes after 30 or so days. I checked this spam box today and didn't realize the amount of crap email that comes my way. Part of me wonders if it is some kind of deal where gmail sells your email address out to weird clearing houses who in turn give your email out to all sorts of crazy marketing scams. You wouldn't believe the wide variety and high volume of marketing for hot lonely housewives, christian singles, all sorts of for-profit bullshit education and degree programs, fortune telling and/or tarot card readings, diet pills, erection and other penis enhancement pills, free estimates for jacuzzi tubs, various fast food restaurant surveys, Lasik, credit card offers, work from home proposals, life insurance, warnings that my computer security is outdated, asian porn, lottery type of games and more.



Outside of these basic spam categories, I also receive very interesting letters offering me large sums of money. The marketing strategies in the letters vary somewhat, but they all share the same end result: they want me to correspond to learn more about how to get the large sum of money they are offering. Here are some of the more creative:

Michelle Obama's foundation AND the United Nations? Well, of course this is legit! 



You notice gmail is helpful with their "Be careful with this message" posted above the email. I think when they initiated the spam onslaught, they didn't realize what they were unleashing and felt obligated to reduce the amount of people being taken advantage of.

...Why am I entitled to this?


I like how this one apologizes for invading my privacy and then calls upon god to bless me.


You are writing me on behalf of who?


Notice the opposite angles: intense gmail warning and the paragraph starting with "hello friend"


Hi, I'm fine, not looking for an Asian bride either. 


I am always fascinated with these emails. What's with the last sentence? 


Wow, the Google Management Team submitted my name to you and your wife? This has to be real!


Michelle Obama and United Nations, again!


I wonder what kind of godly project Mrs. Batovich has in mind? 


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